On How To Trust The Process
"If you don’t know where you are in the process, it is very hard to trust it."
I am not, by nature, a patient person. I want things quickly, or I give up on them1.
I’ve done all I can to remind myself to “Trust The Process.” Yet here I sit staring at a first draft again thinking, “this sucks, throw it out,” rather than, “this is a first draft! Edit it and make it better.2”
As much as we may tell ourselves that we need to trust the process — I, at least, don’t always know what that means.
When I recorded Somewhere Else, I spent months in the lead up playing gigs and fleshing out parts with a locked-in band and a collection of road-tested tunes. When we finished our first few days, the unmixed bounces sounded incredibly close to what I wanted the final product to be.
“I’ve been staring at a house under construction, looking at the beams of wood and concrete and asking why it doesn’t feel decorated.”
This time, however, is different. I’m back in the studio, deep in the next set of 10 songs. And while I know this collection is more mature, more authentic and aligned with who I am as a person – I have freaked the fuck out at almost every step.
Why? Well, I’m coming at this in a different way. I’ve got the same band, the same producer, but instead of fleshing this stuff out in a small rehearsal room, we’ve been building these songs in the studio. We’d played a few of these songs, but we learned many of them the day we started recording. It’s quite cool: we can work improvisationally, capture pure creative impulses, then take the time to refine them.
But I freaked out because I did not know how this process would go. If you don’t know where you are in the process, it is very hard to trust it.
The broad lesson here is that I’ve been staring at a house under construction, looking at the beams of wood and concrete and asking why it doesn’t feel decorated.
In my specific case, I forgot how much a scratch vocal3 can change the way a song feels, how one cymbal mixed too loud can make everything feel muddy, how a pass of tambourine can change everything. These are simple fixes, things that come just from spending a little more time.
“Trusting The Process” does not mean blind faith: it means careful evaluation of what you’re creating — but doing so only with the an eye on where you are and what’s to come.
Because that’s what makes us artists: we see what we’re creating, not just what’s already created.
The truth is, those first few freak happened because I let what wasn’t quite right yet outshine what was already excellent. The big word here is “yet.”
Because there’s plenty of time for decorating. And the decorations don’t mean dick if the wood beams and concrete aren’t exceptional.
My wife has grown to understand “my process” as, “oh, once he quits and curses at himself for a while, that’s when I know he’s really going to do it.” Thankfully, I am also resilient and stubborn.
I saw a meme the other day that said “Does the process know we’re trusting it?” That made me laugh.
“Scratch” means “placeholder.” Oftentimes you’ll sing the song live with the band to get the feeling, but then re-record the vocal later. An excellent vocal is pretty much everything for a song, and even an 8/10 can kill the vibe.